
Training to be a sex surrogate felt right – but it was her first client, of almost 400, whose heartbreaking confession made A UK woman turn up the heat on the controversial career that she insists she “was born to do.”
Kaly Miller working as a sports massage therapist when she came across an ad seeking open-minded body therapists. That unexpected moment led to a life-altering career shift – one that would take her into the private worlds of hundreds of clients seeking healing through touch and intimacy.
‘Taken on a journey’
In an appearance on This Morning with Ben Shephard and Cat Deeley, Miller spoke candidly about her unconventional profession and the deeply emotional experiences that have come with it.
She explained that, although sex surrogates may engage in sexual activity with clients, their work is distinct from sex work. The sessions are designed to address the emotional, psychological, and physical aspects of intimacy, often supporting those who struggle profoundly with connection.
“I was not expecting it,” she told the hosts. “I don’t think anyone sits at home and says, ‘I’m going to be a surrogate partner’ – I think everyone is taken on a journey.”
The Naked Room
That journey for Miller began with a three-year degree in Erotology – the study of sexual love and desire – before continuing under the guidance of Vena Blanchard, president of the International Professional Surrogates Association (IPSA).
Today, she runs her own practice, The Naked Room, working without supervision and charging up to $1,700USD per session.
Miller said many of her clients have families or partners, but when it comes to support, her children and parents remain her “number one fans.”
Client rules
Before agreeing to work with any client, Miller holds a free exploratory Zoom consultation to assess goals, boundaries, and mutual comfort.
“There is no guarantee I will agree to take on a client and I have turned people away, including a man who joined the Zoom call naked,” Miller said. “Once I have agreed to work with someone, the progress is based on the individual, though I like to have a minimum of three Zoom calls before meeting in person.”
Clients, she explained, are required to provide a recent negative STI test, and sign consent forms. “I always use condoms,” she clarified, adding that “safety is paramount.”
‘Don’t want to die’ without love
Since starting, Miller estimates she has slept with around 400 clients, though she says she doesn’t keep count. Yet one man, her very first client, remains etched in her memory – and changed her life forever.
“My first client was an incredible person that had spent their lives feeling very shy, very awkward, never really progressing into intimacy, they were in their mid 60s,” she started.
“I asked, ‘Why are you here? What brought you to this?’ and I didn’t expect the depth of the answer: ‘I don’t want to die without knowing what love feels like.”
The man, she explained, lived an isolated life. His only physical contact was at the corner store, where he frequently shopped and paid “with coins because the only touch they ever had was when they paid the cashier and brushed hands.”
“He used to look out of the window and this woman that passed by and he would imagine [being in love] but never quite ever having the experience, or the confidence, or the experience to move forward,” she continued.
“Then – I felt I am in the right space; this is what I was born for – everyone has a karma or something to fulfil, but this is my thing.”
The client met with his sex surrogate monthly for a year, slowly undoing decades of shame and emotional repression.
“It was very interesting because of the age gap, he was telling me stories about his upbringing, which is once upon a time,” Miller shared.
And through their sessions, he began to break through.
“Eventually after a year, they actually found their own intimate relationship. They managed to break that barrier and did feel what love felt like,” she said of her client finding his first love.
‘Myriad of memories’
“My heart literally goes up…I know the voice, I know the person, I know the feeling of them, I know their journey, what it looked like…I have this myriad of memories, of magical moments. Moments that will never be forgotten,” she told Shephard and Deeley.
Even her family has embraced her path: “My kids are at home watching, my kids and my parents are my number one fans,” the mother said, adding “certainly my dad. He’s like, ‘Hey, this is my girl.’”
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