Riley Gaines Turns Down $3 Million Partnership With Nike: “I’m Not Saving Your Woke Brand”

Riley Gaines says she could really use the money but there’s no she’s going to take it from Nike.

“I’m not saving your woke brand,” Gaines said on Joe Rogan’s podcast, “they need true stars like me to put the shame of yet another trans person who steals from women.”

Riley was on her way to greatness when along came a swimmer with an incredibly long wingspan and muscles developed far past the typical female to steal her spot.

The swimmer was Lia Thomas, the biological male who swam to glory as a woman, leaving women like Riley to pick up the pieces and move on.

Without that fateful day, The entire world would have known the name, Riley Gaines. She would have taken 5th place in her event instead of tying for 5th in an NCAA women’s swimming event, ensuring her fame and fortune.

“I was robbed,” Gaines told anyone who would listen until someone finally figured out she’s perfect tater food, “and I had to see Thomas’ male genitals.” It’s her willingness to be open about her experience and confidence that men on the right will listen to her because she says buzzwords and qualifies as basically attractive.

“She’s the next Tomi Lahren,” said Joe Barron, who doesn’t need a title for this one, “all she needs is some plastic surgery. Her eyes are too close together.”

Related Posts

Which Chair You Choose Reveals Who You Trust to Stay

People pass through our lives in different ways—some leaving clear footprints, others fading so quietly we only notice their absence later. Friendships shift, relationships evolve, and even…

Catherine O’Hara’s Quiet Power: A Career That Continues to Shape Comedy

For decades, Catherine O’Hara has possessed a rare ability to draw deep laughter while gently revealing something emotional beneath the surface. When she recently appeared publicly in a moment…

Why a Simple Egg Breakfast Can Make Mornings Feel Easier After 60

For many people, breakfast is rushed, skipped, or treated as an afterthought—grabbed between responsibilities or delayed until hunger becomes unavoidable. Yet the first meal of the day…

Why Catherine O’Hara’s Name Sparked Widespread Concern—and What It Reveals About Her Cultural Impact

A wave of concern rippled across social media after unverified online posts falsely suggested the passing of beloved actress and comedian Catherine O’Hara. The claims spread quickly, prompting…

A 1930s Classic Offering Timeless Charm and Room for Inspired Renewal

Tucked beneath a canopy of mature trees, this brick home from the 1930s stands as a quiet testament to enduring Southern craftsmanship. With its traditional proportions and…

What Your Favorite Ring Might Quietly Say About You

Have you ever slipped on a ring and felt an unexpected sense of connection, even if you couldn’t quite explain why? Jewelry often works on an intuitive…