A pirate walked into a bar and the..

A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said: ‘Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible. ‘What do you mean?’ said the pirate, ‘I feel fine.’ Bartender: ‘What about the wooden leg? You didn’t have that before.

Pirate: ‘Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I’m fine now. Bartender: ‘Well, ok, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand? ‘Pirate: ‘We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I’m fine, really…’ Bartender: ‘What about that eye patch? ‘Bartender: ‘What about that eye patch?’ Pirate: ‘Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them shit in my eye.’ Bartender: ‘You’re kidding, you lost an eye just from bird shit?’ Pirate: ‘It was my first day with the hook.

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