70-Year-Old Widow Posts A Newspaper Ad To Find A Husband

If you stop to think about someone who is ‘old’, what age comes to mind. This is an interesting question because that age continues to grow as we get closer to it. When we are in our teens, we might think that someone in their 30s is old but when we are in our 50s, someone in their 70s is still fairly young. There is a misconception that many people have about ‘old’ people and that is that when you get old, you lose out on the spice of life. This 70-year-old widow posted an ad for a husband in the newspaper and blows that theory out of the water.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again… She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you – you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Related Posts

Farewell to Bob ‘Bongo’ Starkie: Skyhooks Legend Passes Away at 73

Skyhooks guitarist Bob “Bongo” Starkie has passed away at the age of 73 after a battle with cancer, the iconic Australian band confirmed. The beloved musician—an Aussie…

The Father’s Day Conversation That Changed the Way I Saw My Family

Father’s Day was meant to be easy and joyfully predictable—the kind of morning filled with tiny fingerprints in pancake batter, crayon drawings proudly taped to the fridge,…

The Week My Employer Accidentally Showed Me My True Value

I sensed something was wrong the moment my boss asked me to stay late “all week” to train the woman stepping into my role. Still, nothing prepared…

Why a Simple Plastic Bottle Trend Is Reminding Drivers to Stay Mindful

In the rush of daily life—balancing work, appointments, and family priorities—it’s natural to overlook the smaller details around us. Yet moments of mindfulness in everyday spaces, such…

Europe Reconsiders How to Support Older Drivers Without Limiting Their Independence

Across Europe, conversations about whether senior motorists should undergo periodic driving evaluations have gained new momentum. Advocates of these check-ins point to the gradual changes in vision,…

The Real Reason Your Bath Towels Have Those Mysterious Lines

A simple question has recently taken social media by storm: What’s the deal with that odd stripe running across our bath towels? What started as a lighthearted online debate…