70-Year-Old Widow Posts A Newspaper Ad To Find A Husband

If you stop to think about someone who is ‘old’, what age comes to mind. This is an interesting question because that age continues to grow as we get closer to it. When we are in our teens, we might think that someone in their 30s is old but when we are in our 50s, someone in their 70s is still fairly young. There is a misconception that many people have about ‘old’ people and that is that when you get old, you lose out on the spice of life. This 70-year-old widow posted an ad for a husband in the newspaper and blows that theory out of the water.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again… She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you – you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Related Posts

The internet is baffled by this optical illusion of six girls with only five pairs of legs

What looks like a glitch in reality is really your brain trying too hard to make sense of overlapping shapes. In the viral photo, the second girl’s…

Economic Approval Shift Stuns Washington

Trump’s modest rise is tethered to something brutally simple: people finally feel a little less squeezed. Lower gas prices, bustling stores and a steadier economy don’t erase…

Gwen Stefani Shares a Personal Message—and Fans Rally Behind Her

Gwen Stefani has long been celebrated for her creativity, individuality, and unmistakable influence on both music and fashion. From her groundbreaking years with No Doubt to her…

Inside the Quiet, Carefully Guided Childhood of Barron Trump

Barron William Trump, born on March 20, 2006, in Manhattan, grew up as the only child of Donald and Melania Trump. Throughout his childhood, Melania took an…

A Small Hand Stretch That Brings Big Relief

We rely on our hands far more than we acknowledge—typing, texting, steering, lifting, scrolling, and managing countless small tasks from morning until night. All that constant movement…

Why 3 to 5 A.M. Is the Most Disruptive Time in Your Sleep Cycle

Waking up suddenly in the middle of the night can feel especially frustrating when you’ve followed every bedtime routine perfectly. Yet many people find themselves awake between…